Monday, July 03, 2006

I've been mulling a lot of things over lately. Pondering, if you will. Hopefully with purpose.

Every once in awhile I'm finding that I go into "woe is me" mode. A little bit of self-pity and just plain selfishness about my life. If I'm realistic, I think that probably happens just about once a month, if you know what I mean. Pitiful, Miserable and Selfish.

Last week sometime I turned on the TV before it was time to roll out of bed and as I was surfing through the channels, I came upon a show featuring speaker Beth Moore. She spoke about each of us having a purpose and a calling from God, but unfortunately sometimes our fears get in the way of fulfilling that purpose and calling. I recognize that I walk in fear much of the time. Many days as I go to work I pray that I won't be fearful ... fearful of speaking up; fearful of being seen as incompetent and unable to do the job to the best of my abilities; fearful of interacting with other people.

I'm recognizing that sometimes what I'm most fearful of is what other people will think of me. That's just plain goofy, but it's so easy to believe those lies and fears instead of the truths we know about ourselves.