Words of Wisdom?

This weekend I had two wedding showers to attend ... both the same evening. I think the last wedding shower I went to was in 1998, so it's been awhile. You know you're getting older when the bride is the daughter of a friend.

At the one shower, we were to write down words of advice to the bride. I arrived late to this shower (it was the second one of the evening) and so my piece of advice never got written down. I did spend some time thinking about what on earth I would write. What advice could I give?

Eric and I have been married almost 17 years -- we were introduced by a couple of friends on a blind date. Before I even met him, I had a very strong sense that this was the last man I was going to date; this was the one. I can only credit that to God. So here's my Top 10 List of Things to Remember as a Wife:

1o. Flirting is OK. Actually, flirting is a great tool to keeping romance alive!

9. You'll do a lot of things together as a couple, but take time to do things for yourself as well. It's important that you maintain friendships with your "girlfriends". They're a huge support system.

8. Laugh a lot. Inside jokes are great. Not a year goes by at daylight savings time that Eric doesn't say "Gee, it's 10:00? It only feels like 9:00". It wouldn't be daylight savings without that little joke.

7. Sometimes you need to give up your agenda. I'm incredibly agenda-driven and that was fine when I was single, but when there is someone else to consider, there have to be concessions and some give and take.

6. Be mindful of your husband's needs. Serve him. That doesn't mean wait on him hand and foot and be at his beck and call for every whim. It means consider what he needs and how you can best minister to those needs. Be the hands and feet of Jesus to your husband.

5. Be a good listener. Be patient and ready to really hear everything he says, and doesn't say, for that matter. And then once you've heard his heart, pursue him to let him know that you've listened, and that you still love him.

4. Pray for him. If the prayer of a righteous man availeth much, just think what the prayer of a righteous wife can do!

3. Extend him grace. When he pisses you off and when there are days that you just can't stand him or don't know what to do with him, extend him grace. And if you're not sure you have any grace for him, ask Jesus to give more to you. He gives it freely and abundantly.

2. Be best friends.

1. Love as best as you know how. I am only able to love my husband because Jesus loves me. Tell him often -- in words and in your actions.